25.Be Careful

25.Be Careful

A child will be influenced by the environment in which he is grown up. A child's inner power is grown by his environment, surroundings and occurrences around. A child needs other help to adjust with his environment. By proper control of the instincts of a child between the ages 2 to 5 years, his health, social behaviour, interest, language, creativity and intelligence can be improved. A child grows up as an ideal man when his notions, feelings, memories, emotions, habits, attentions etc. are properly controlled and conducted. The instincts of a child are related to his biological needs and desires. Environment decides which inherited qualities of a child will be flourished and which, will not. But interest, taste and temperament of a child decide which affects and in what degree, the child will accept from his environment. A child is not born with any good or bad tendency but his environment influences him. A timely guidance will teach him, what manner is acceptable and what is not. It is better to introduce a system that children can discuss about any of their problems with their elders and get a solution. A child achieves self-control through discipline. Punctuality gives a child a sense of security. Inspiration and an environment of love and affection is necessary for growing self-confidence in a child and to start his education. If the  basic needs of a child are met with affection and love, a sense of security grows in him, he relies on the nature and starts trusting others. If you regard a child's  speeches and acts, love him, rule him when needed he will learn how to respect others. Other's remarks, jokes, negligence, praise to a child, affects his personality. Inspiration and praise instead of criticism and rebuke, affirms a child's self-respect. Recognition of a child's success creates a positive self-realization in him. A child always behaves simply. A child's basic characteristics, for example, his physical structure, strength, ability, emotion, feelings, intelligence etc. everything affect his self-realization. The children in whom the self-realization grows properly, can adjust themselves in social life, enjoy mixing with others and also succeed in their studies. Independent and distinction is much valuable for a child. A sense of security is most necessary for a sound flowishment of personality of a child. Good manners and self-control of parents are transferred to children at a later stage. Parents ideals, affection, love and care make a child confident. A child loves them who shows affection and love to them. Like physical needs, everybody have some mental needs, such as, desire for affection, love, care and expression of feelings, which are met by inter-personal relations. We all want companions, specially, affection of parents is very much needed for a child. If a child's emotional life is disturbed in any way, he leave urine in bed. If a child can meet his independent wills and if his security is not endangered, he need not tell a lie. Success of child's later life depends on his self-assessment. A child is to be rectified from childhood itself. If a child is not guided properly, tendency for wrong acts increases in him. Many maladjustments in matured stage depend on unwanted experiences in boyhood. If a child cannot have good feelings, he faces many mental disturbances in his later age. To grow a child full-fledged, his different stages, such as, speaking, passing motion, sleep and sex, are important. A child's primitive power is spent by his verbal actions. Due to dissatisfaction of speaking from the age of 2 months upto 2 years, tendencies for chewing fingers, too much smoking, drinking wine, too much eating etc. grow in a child. During the age between 2 to 4 years, due to too much restriction in passing motion and fears and shyness, parsimony, sense of too much cleanliness, constipation, adamant character, etc grow in a child's character. Between 4 to 6 years, a child starts to adopt the ideologies of his parents. Between 6 to 10 years, a child's social behaviour improves a lot. From 10 to 14 years, tendencies for offence and crime are seen in a boy due to edom. Due to an immatured mentality, children often feel monotony, can't concentrate on anything for long. As such, the best way is to engage him in some job keeping his interest and enthusiasm intact. If a child can do something independently, he becomes enthusiastic and active. As soon as a child becomes self-sufficient, confusion and frustration start reducing in him. Proper guidance and firm principles of parents quickens a child's moral sense and enriches his personality. During the flourishment of personality, a child becomes self-dependent and self-sufficient from a stage of dependability on others. For the proper flourishment of personality, creativity and merit of a child, a favourable family atmosphere is very important. Due to inactiveness towards authoritative role, unconditional obedience and trust towards the family, distrust towards the unknown persons parents, make a child inefficient for dealing with the worldly affairs. Through taking decisions and doing daily activities self-confidence and efficiency are grown in a child. Make a child self-dependent from his childhood. Inspire child target for an independent profession instead of service. The greater world outside a limited circle, helps a child a lot to acquire a sense of valuation. Playing games is the most important job for a child. If you keep a child busy with games or any job, his anxieties will go away and his self-confidence will increase. If a child becomes afraid, make him familiar with the object of fear, drive away offensive tendency from his mind and keep him away from the object. If a child behaves abnormal, find out the cause of his mental disturbance and take remedial action. By proper use of television, knowledge and culture of a child can be improved. A child is educated through others' instances and the jobs he do regularly. A child earns to be good conduct through teamwork. A child learns to be realistic when he grows up with a group of children. A child learns something by himself. Sings of knowledge are seen in him at its own system. At first, a child understands concrete objects and then he gradually learns about the abstract things to meet the necessities of life. A child analyses a new situation in the light of his past experience. A child understands what other says, long before he can speak. Use of physical posture while talking, is meaningful and memorable to a child, which is a necessity for his social life. Mixing with different classes of people is very important for him, it plays an important role in shaping his behaviour. The association of a child maintains makes a long ranging affect in his future life. Even the depth of these mixing also affects him greatly. The behaviour of a man to serve his own purpose depends mainly on his experiences in childhood. Text books cannot educate a man in the way of his environment gives him. Influence of environment cannot be ignored. Rather, we should admit that a man is mostly controlled by his environment. Heredity of a child is not the prime factor but in what environment he is brought up, is important. Bring any child and keep him with the master class of people, you will see that later on he too will become a master. Again, if a king's son is brought up with the labours, he will be a labour himself at his maturity. The main factor is a man's surrounding. First of all, a child learns how to play games, then he learns reading, thereafter he learns how to enjoy something and again after the enjoyment he performs religions activities. Every child is born with his basic characteristics. Try to find out the importance of the basic characteristics of a child and his religious belief on the basis of the objects of his surrounding. Be confident to a child's personality, don't control him excessively, even an unwanted interference to a child's extreme personal matter, is not good for his proper mental growth. Teach a child according to his power of acceptance, in this way, some day, he may become a  famous specialist. The world is the only book for a child and informations are his only education. A favourable family circle is based on love, sympathy, regardfulness, discipline and cordiality. A child is to be taught like a child, he is to be served with genuine things, is to be bonded with humanly bondage and is to be made habituated to work and adjust with others. He is to be inspired for a good future, his health is to be looked after properly, to be encouraged for education, to be trained upto work by signals, to be compelled by punishment and to be made obedient. The creatures which are having maximum quantity of fluid in their bodies are to be trained softly and those having the major portion of solid materials in  their bodies, are to be trained toughly. A man acquires humanly qualities through teachers, physicians, scholars, well-wishers and his guardian. A straight guidance is better for a child, but he should be taught about a bit complicated matters with his maturity. Good conduct of children is formed by proper education. The moral education which is started in childhood and boyhood, have a long-lasting affect on a man's character. Purpose of moral education is to make a child conscious about his surrounding, his duties towards it and culture of his society, to create a tendency in him for acquiring knowledge, feeling and evaluating others. Moral education can be given by family, educational institutions, prayer halls, friends and associates relatives, class of society environment of working place, institutions and public relation medias etc. In the light of the occurrences of his surroundings, a feelings of simple belief or disbelief is grown in the mind of a child. At the matured age, a man's thoughts become firm only. A child's first lesson should be to obey his seniors and the second lesson will be what ever you like. Only he can rule with assurance, who has learnt how to obey orders cheerfully. Parents' control on their children is like water for corn fields. First of all teach a child to obey his seniors and then to behave nicely. Too much love spoils a child. Love has many defects, whereas control has many good effects. So, it is better to keep your son under discipline or control. Take good care of your child in the first five years of his life. Keep him under discipline during the next ten years. At the age of sixteen, behave friendly with him. From the childhood itself, children are to be given proper knowledge and they are to be habituated to practice it. Nobody can expect wheat after cultivating chick-pea. Likely, to remain in the path of religion, one is to obey the orders and instructions and is to maintain good behaviour and conduct  in his weals and woes. As a man gives more importance to a thing which he loves. Ornaments cannot be made by pure gold. A bit hardening material is to be mixed, otherwise it won't be strong and useable. Likely, a man also should have a bit impurity. The boys and girls who remain fully pure like genuine gold. For whom their parents are boasted of, break up a family and creates unrest at a later stage. To bring up a child properly, he is to be made happy. Nature and children are the most clean and sacred. A child is an angel whose wings become shorter when his legs become longer. Living with millions of cheerful children, is better than being a king of a kingdom. During the first ten years of human life, a man can lead a real life. With wonder, looks at the blue sky with his blue eyes. Playing with birds, river, kite and its reel, only can make him much happy. From a grass hopper to a lizard, everything appears to be too beautiful to his eyes and he rushes to catch hold if it. The colourful flowers wonder him. To him, in daylight, the world is too large with fields, lakes, corn fields and white feathers of the ducks. And at night, it becomes smaller and smaller like a room and less than that. The lap of mother is the world of a child at night. But crossing the age of ten years, we can say that we are not growing but proceeding towards death. We can say that we have purchased ticket and bill has been paid. A child is helpless. A child speaks like a child, understands like a child, thinks like a child, and when he becomes matured, he leaves the childish habits, this is natural. We all change with the change of time, children too do that and as such, they cannot be blamed. The unspoken love of a child is rotated with his dearest and nearest ones. Will power becomes active in a child before power of thinking. In this point of view, it can be said that a child is selfish, tends to crime and is happy with himself. A child is a creation of nature but a matured man is to a great extent, a creation of man itself. Plantation of a tree by a child, is a matter of pleasure. The plant which is planted by the immatured hands of a child, will make a remembrance in the minds of the parents about the sweet memory of fifty years back. A young man should plant tree by his old parents. A photograph becomes old and faded within a short time but a tree remain fresh for a long time. As children are the source of pleasure of a family, green trees are the symbol of softness of the nature. A child's mind is beautiful like a heavenly flower. If you give a child a little love, he will give you a huge in return. A child comes to the world with an empty hand alright, but by his charming smile, childish behaviour, beautiful face, incorrect words, are all his wealth, he gets service in lieu of those, does not want anything like a beggar. A man is as his mother has made him. All of us are like that. For renaissance in a country, many things are not required, but only some good mothers are required. Wise people come from the family where educated and virtuous mothers are there. A child's physical beauty depends on the mental beauty of his mother. A mother's mental attitude, her psycho-physical health affect a child's psycho-physical health and his relation with his mother after his birth. A child is much influenced by a calm, steady and happy mother and a child becomes calm and happy. Absence of mother, during the first three years of child's life, harms his self-confidence and sense of security permanently. A mother gets backs the cost of his love to her child instantly with the satisfaction of her mind. Otherwise, she could not accept so much troubles for a long time to bring up his child. In fact, a real love is self-dependent, not dependent to others. A love does not become weak thinking about the return it gets. There are four kinds of slaves, slave by birth, slave by purchase, volunteer slave and slave for shelter. Except in heaven no woman's is so much slave, as a beloved to her lover. But above all, nobody is so much slave like a mother. In the world, nothing is more charming to a man than his children. A child gets the most well wishing from his mother. Mothers don't teach lessons, don't teach how to be a great man but they austere with their children. A mother is a companion as well as a friend of a child. If a father becomes a mother, he too will be the best austere of his children's mentalities and the best austere to his children. A mother brings up a child with tenderness, mothers' glories are written from ages. A mothers’ life is connected with her children as a vessel with an anchor. To all boys, the smile of his mother is his private wealth, which cannot be compared with anything else. Among all loves, the love of a mother to her child is the sweetest. Mothers only think about the future of their children. As they conceive them for a long days and shows them the light of the world. A mother is unparallel, nothing in the world can be compared with her. The world is dark without mother. Fascination for home is based on a mother. A child wants his mother, a mother does not have a stick in her hand, she does not rule her children cruelly but she has the magic-stick of life, has nectar and a heart full of love. He who is deprived of the love of his mother, is really ill-fated and unhappy. To a child, no woman is parallel to her mother. However much you extol cakes and sweets, there is nothing like rice. Maternal aunt, paternal aunt or Brindaban, what does it matter. A mother is the greatest gift of nature to a child. A child may become wicked to her mother at his maturity, but a mother remains as she was. As a mother stays a longer time at a home and mixes up cordially with his child, a child, unifies the looks out and philosophy of his mothers life. As such, it is quite natural that the responsibility of education of a child lies with his mother. Association and guidance of a father create a sense of moral and social values within a child. A father's self-control is the best instance for his children. As soon as a child is born, pleasure as well as tension are created in the minds of his parents. As such, parental time is always memorable for pleasure and tension at the same time. Parents pleasure at the well being of their children, remains hidden, like fear and tension for any mishappening to their children. They never express any feelings infront of their children. To a son, father is a shelter. When a son is alone in the world which is unknown to him, his father is the only source of his shelter. In the growing life of a child, he needs a strong associate and a  father gives him that association. Not flesh and blood but heart only grows relation between a father and a son. A child resembles his father at least partially, if not fully. A son resembles his father, and a daughter her mother. In every child,  the personality of his father is more or less present. A child leopard finally proves that it is in fact, a leopard. It is not important what a captive leopard is fed, as it will surely go back to jungle. Like father like son. The best plant grows from the best seed. A tree is known by its fruit, not by leaves. If there is a scented tree in a garden, the whole garden is becomes scented. Likewise if there is only one good boy in a family, the whole family can boast of him. The moon is the lamp at night, the sun is of dawn, religion is of the whole universe and an honest son is the lamp of a family. A good son pleases his parents by his good conduct. A qualified son only is better than one hundred illiterate sons, as the moon only enlightens the dark night but thousands of stars can't do it. The illiterate son cannot match himself in the meeting of the scholars, like an egret among the ducks. A qualified son solves all problems and brightens the face of his father. If a son becomes wiser that his father, people obey the son himself. If a father is known by his son, the father becomes too much glad. Nothing is greater to a son than the glory of his father and to a father, the respectful character of his son. A child is the image of his parents. In the world, most of the relations depend on some exchange. But the parents love is beyond any return or expectation. It expresses itself leaving behind all sins, crimes, filthiness and ungratefulness. It is not a loan but a gift. Only the loves of parents never slow down. Every generation rebels with their fathers and makes friendship with grand fathers. Everybody resembles the character of his mother more than his father. An intelligent child knows his father well. He who understands his children, is a wise father. Anything good or bad of a child depends on his father as such, there is a bit ruling along with love in a father's character and at the same time, there is a bit fear along with the devotion of a son towards his father. A father is to give orders to his son in every step to remain in right path and the son is to obey it accordingly. As such, there should not be any relaxation in the behaviour between a father and a son. The father who can find out the faults of his son before his good qualities, can present his son, a bright future. The children whose faults are never pointed out by their parents, lead their lives with their faults not corrected throughout. To a son, his father is more important than one hundred school teachers. It is very easy to give birth to a child but it is hard to be a ideal parent. Regard a child's desires and opinions. Don't show excessive parentship on him. Don't interfere in his extremely personal matters. It is far better to bond your children with the bondage of regard and courtesy than fear. By affection, intelligent behaviour and welfare, a child can be kept under control. Pleasure of parents are silent and private. Their sorrows and fears are also alike. Parents feel pleasure to work for their children. All parents want to see their children smiling. As there is no substitute of parents, likewise a child also cannot be substituted. Love fulfils a life which is the greatest power of inspiration. Parents, that is, a family is a living treasure of knowledge for a child. A child can cross a sea by the inspiration of his family. Little boys and girls learn by seeing others. For them, example is better than advice. People interested to accumulate resources and avoids courageous act due to their children, miser and cowardness. He who is educated, handsome, healthy, solvent and earning, is eligible to be father of a child. Don’t make a successor before you acquire the minimum required solvency. The unwanted children of the unable and poverty-stricken parents, suffer from want of food and education are only increasing the problems of the country. As such, those who can't arrange for food and education for their children, should remain childless. The parents who don't care for their children's education, are like enemies for their children. Parents should teach positive values to their children. Discipline, sympathy, punctuality, sacrifice for a greater interest show them the way to achieve their goals. In an aristocrat family they have some basic characters like values of soul and morality trust, obedience, sense of responsibility, sense of authority, sense of obligation, justice, and serving mankind. These characteristics are transferred from one generation to another through education and instances. Mutual trust is hampered when this process is not maintained. The service of a family is not measurable with financial value, ruling is not continued here by pressure. Here the relationship can not built up on the basis of power or exchange. The family is based on faith, love and dependency. The relationship each other is needed during crisis period. All provision here make the family into a social institution. The community is the place of depending each other. The rule is to be followed for living in the society, which make the society potential, be tuned into livable. A man from a mean family cannot become generous, a man becomes poor due to his bad activities, mad due to mother and illiterate due to father. To obey father is the religion, he is the way to heaven and he is to be devoted. If a father is satisfied, God is satisfied. Mother is greater than the earth, father is higher than the heaven. Remember that yours parents are your living God and Godess. The status of parents is next to God. There are some rule of the nature, which all of us should obey. The first and the most important law of the nature is to love and respect parents. Love of a beloved slows down once upon a time, a husband may hate her wife and vice versa but the love of parent only flows for their children without any deviation throughout their lives. He who wants to enter the heaven through its main gate, should satisfy his parents. Parents are the shelters of their children, a mother feeds her breast to her child saves her child from danger and helps  for the sake of her childs welfare. Services of a man  for  the welfare of the society are  the stairs towards heaven. We have inherited our bodies from our parents. So we should please them even at the cost of our  hardships. He who gives earning source to a hungry man, saves one from danger, hands over a bride on the basis of matrimony, presents the religious wishdom and the progenitor are the five persons who are treated as father. Own mother, wife of preceptor, wife of a religious teacher, wife of king, foster mother of preceptor and the earth, are the seven persons who are to be treated as mother. Behave well with your parents.